Play along with your co-workers, friends, and families today!

(from John Fitzgibbon in Ballarat)

WHY...

  • Do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
  • Are lemon pies made from lemons, and meat pies are made from meat, yet cottage pie is not made from cottages?
  • Do pedestrians push the button more than once when wanting the lights to change?
  • Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?
  • Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but checks when you say the paint is wet?
  • Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
  • Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
  • Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
  • Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?
  • If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
  • Why is it that no matter what colour bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
  • Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
  • Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
  • Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
  • Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
  • How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
  • When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot?'
  • Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
  • In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
  • How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
  • How do you know when you're behind a tree?